Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Break Update

I needed time to feel things out.

I don't have the energy to go into how things fell apart at school. I tried and while I accomplished certain tasks I didn't realize the impact I'd intended. There were issues I should have handled better.  I should have been more proactive.  I should have foreseen the drama, the escalating bullshit, the lure of money and the fickle nature of followers on a team owned by an ambiguous third party without clear incentives and penalties. It was a gamble and it fell apart exactly as it should have. Ultimate conclusions don't take rocket science to foresee. The conditions of success don't either.  I'm focusing now on bringing the plan forward into its next phase. 

I've long talked about building a non-profit. I've long talked about a variety of content initiatives that I've wanted to pursue and I've long talked about being my own boss.

Now I've graduated and so now is the time. But it's not like I'm going to pop out of a cake ready to go.

I've setup a personal website and begun the steady work of populating it. I've been considering how to moderate my social media initiatives alongside personal projects which include writing and film. I've signed on to help promote and fund-raise a friend's thesis film (a job for which I'm really excited about and intensively nervous about as well) and I've started streaming video games on Twitch because of it's a fun way to vent steam and develop long term revenue.

But none of these are jobs and that itch still needs scratching . . . badly.

I'm going to get back into posting here as well as on the blog for The Brooklyn Apprentice Union for Storytellers and my personal blog Chasing Volition. It's crazy to manage three let alone personal writing goals and any that support the new film I'm working on and in the future I believe I'll develop some insight on why diversifying my blogs was probably a big mistake. Right now though I just have far too much to say and too many goals to achieve. I was born to run a company and while the gap between working alone today and leading others tomorrow seems like a giant chasm, I just can't and won't shake it off.

I believe I'm meant to do something big that people will benefit from and remember. It'll be in the arts and it will give people a way back to each other.

- Carlos